You own a home that is mobile and 5 cars that aren't.
You think the stock market has a fence around it.
Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater.
Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years.
Chiggers are included on your list of top 5 hygiene concerns.
You burn your yard rather than mow it.
You re-use dental floss to save money.
You've ever drunk mouthwash just because you're too lazy to walk down to the liquor store.
Your bumper sticker reads "If you're missing your cat, look in my treads. " (sorry Katie)
You think the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.
Your kids learned to shoot before they learned to walk.
Higher math means counting over 10.
Have a great day!
Little old me...
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